You Won’t Believe Where Max Keiser Says Bitcoin Is Headed Next! 🚀

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Ah, Max Keiser—a man who once wielded a pen in the meandering annals of finance, now haunting the bright El Salvadoran sun as Bitcoin advisor to the president. Behold! With the nonchalance of a sorcerer shaking his flask and not spilling a single dram, Keiser announces: Bitcoin is about to do a trick so spectacular, not even the Moscow cats would dare attempt it on a Monday.

He predicts, with the air of a diner reading tea leaves after his third shot of vodka, that the oldest and perhaps most stubborn cryptocurrency will leap by 410%, and rather promptly. “In a jiffy,” he purrs, as though such things are everyday affairs.

“Bitcoin to whisk away to $500,000 in a jiffy”

Max beckoned to the assembled cryptocrats and the wider, slightly feverish Twitter crowd, forecasting a leap in Bitcoin’s price with the certainty of a waiter announcing poisoned soup. According to our soothsayer, money detests a vacuum as much as your neighbor detests your Wi-Fi password: “Nature hates a vacuum and so does money.” Anyone with a broom and a memory of physics can surely confirm.

And thus, our Bitcoin OG (a creature somewhere between a financial shaman and a street magician) asserts: BTC, presently lounging at $98,000, is preparing to zip to $500,000 as briskly as a telegram sent from Kiev to Odessa—“The vacuum from $98,000 to $500,000 is gaining suction. BTC price will whisk away to that price in a jiffy.” One almost expects to see a great whoosh as the coins vanish from your pockets. 💸

Nature hates a vacuum and so does money.

The vacuum from $98,000 to $500,000 is gaining suction.

Like a nmematic tube, BTC price will whisk away to that price in a jiffy.

— Max Keiser (@maxkeiser) May 7, 2025

Meanwhile, as this drama unfolds, Bitcoin—dear, beloved harbinger of both nightmares and yachts—has gained 3.17% in the last 24 hours, nudging the door toward $100,000. Apparently, the market simply couldn’t help itself after the Federal Reserve decided to keep interest rates as unmoving as a Russian customs official—4.25% to 4.5% for those who keep score.

Keiser comments on Saylor’s use of AI to work with Bitcoin

On a separate but equally theatrical note, Keiser decided to lob commentary at Michael Saylor’s latest escapade—a pas de deux with artificial intelligence. Along with fellow financial acrobat Vivek Ramaswamy, Saylor is apparently using AI to dream up new ways to secure the great Bitcoin Treasury Model. AI: the modern equivalent of a crystal ball, but more likely to spill your secrets to the neighbors.

And now, in a plot twist worth a toast, Ramaswamy intends to send his company, Strive Asset Management, sashaying to the public markets by merging with Asset Entities, all the whilst accumulating Bitcoin the way one might collect rare stamps—only considerably riskier and with far fewer grandmothers involved. If all goes to plan, they’ll amass their Bitcoin horde using the same mystical stock-and-debt incantations as Saylor’s own Strategy.

Financial engineers (Saylor & Vivek) are using AI to invent novel security structures to maximize the Bitcoin Treasury model.

The results are redefining finance globally and adding significantly to the Bitcoin demand.

OG’s like myself who have watched Bitcoin outperform…

— Max Keiser (@maxkeiser) May 7, 2025

Meanwhile, Michael Saylor, never shy at a microphone, revealed during his recent soliloquy at the grandly titled Strategy World event that the latest maneuvers to buy another mountain of Bitcoin owe much to AI’s new algorithms. As a result, Strategy has increased its fundraising plan for Bitcoin to a princely $84 billion. The company already guards a treasure of $52 billion in Bitcoin—enough, perhaps, for a small principality somewhere warm, with excellent coffee and terrible Wi-Fi.

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2025-05-08 11:54