Ethena Defies Crypto Crash Like a Drunk Defies Gravity! 🚀

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Ah, the curious case of Ethena (ENA $0.44), that peculiar digital chimera which, like a tipsy peasant at a nobleman’s ball, stumbled upwards by 8% while the rest of the crypto rabble-Bitcoin (BTC $106,417) and Ethereum (ETH $3,832)-collapsed like overcooked blini. Truly, a spectacle worthy of a Gogolian smirk! 🤔

And why, you ask? Well, dear reader, let us wade through the murky waters of this absurdity:

The Great Stablecoin Fiasco (Or, How Binance Misplaced Its Abacus)

Not long ago, Ethena’s beloved stablecoin, USDe, decided to take a brief vacation from its dollar peg-plummeting to $0.65 like a bureaucrat fleeing an audit. Naturally, ENA followed suit, tumbling 50% faster than a dropped samovar. But lo! The wizards at Ethena waved their on-chain proof of reserves like a mystical amulet, declaring, “All is well!” Meanwhile, Binance sheepishly admitted their oracle had been sniffing glue (or, more accurately, relying on internal order books thinner than a starving clerk’s salary).

Ah, but redemption! Binance, in a fit of generosity-or perhaps guilt-unveiled a $400 million “Together Initiative” (because nothing says “together” like losing half your money first). Miraculously, USDe clung to its peg like a stubborn barnacle through $1.2 billion in liquidations. Truly, the crypto gods work in mysterious ways. 🙏

Ethena’s Latest Scheme: Stablecoins for Everyone! (Even Your Dog)

Never one to rest, Ethena has now flung its Stablecoin-as-a-Service (SaaS) onto Conduit, a platform hosting more Ethereum rollups than a baker has pirozhki. “Come one, come all!” they cry, offering chains the chance to mint their own stablecoins-because what could possibly go wrong? 🤡

Ethena’s Stablecoin-as-a-Service stack is now available on @conduitxyz

Conduit powers 55% of chains on Ethereum with $4B+ TVL across 60+ mainnet deployments, powering teams from DeFi to RWAs to consumer apps

With this integration, chains building with Conduit can now access…

– Ethena Labs (@ethena_labs) October 17, 2025

Conduit, that humble workhorse, now shepherds $4 billion in TVL-enough to make even the greediest oligarch blush. And ENA? Oh, it basks in its $3.14 billion glory, trading volumes surging like a drunken Cossack on payday. 🎉

Ethena (ENA) Price Action, Oct. 17, 2025 | Source: Coinmarketcap

So there you have it, dear reader: a tale of redemption, absurdity, and stablecoins clinging to pegs like desperate lovers. Will ENA’s rally last? Who knows! But for now, let us raise a glass (or a ledger) to the madness. 🍻

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2025-10-18 06:56