Is the Fed’s Rate Cut the Most Boring Popcorn in Town?

What to Know:

  • Hold onto your Fermats and turtlenecks, folks-the chance of the Federal Reserve cutting interest rates has dwindled to just 30%! ๐Ÿ˜ฑ
  • The Labor Department, in a delightful twist of irony, won’t give us the October jobs report because-guess what!-there was a government shutdown. Talk about bureaucratic plot twists influencing policy decisions. ๐Ÿค“๐Ÿšจ
  • Minutes from the latest Fed meeting read like a soap opera full of drama, with all the characters divided on whether to pause or cut rates. Choose your side: Team Cut-it-Out or Team Let’s-Pause-and-Pom-Poms? ๐ŸŽญ

So, the probability of the U.S. Federal Reserve slashing interest rates by 25 basis points to a shiny new range of 3.5%-3.75% has plummeted to 30%. And yes, that’s down from 50% both yesterday and last week, making October’s whopping 98% seem like a case of economic FOMO. Thanks, CME’s FedWatch tool! ๐Ÿ“ˆ

With the data blackout more prolonged than my binge-watching sessions, policymakers might as well be chugging coffee and squinting through crystal balls to make a call. On Wednesday, with the drama continuing, the Labor Department announced it wouldn’t release the jobs data for October due to the record-breaking government shutdown. Because nothing screams “decisiveness” like uncertainty! โ˜•

The October Fed meeting minutes felt like a family dinner table argument with everyone talking over each other about whether to pause or cut rates. Talk about familial strife! ๐Ÿฝ๏ธ

Meanwhile, Bitcoin decided to throw a party at $91,700, up 0.8%-because why not? ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿ’ธ

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2025-11-20 10:33