Brad Garlinghouse, CEO of Ripple (because who else would name a blockchain company after a wave?), has somehow managed to make “XRP sits at the center of everything” sound less like a business strategy and more like a cult recruitment pitch. “Lock in,” he said, because nothing says ‘trust me’ like a man yelling at the internet. 🚨
But hey, at least he’s consistent! XRP’s now the star of Ripple Prime, the freshly rebranded prime brokerage that used to be called Hidden Road. Because why not give it a name that sounds like a secret society? 🕵️♂️ XRP will “complement services” there-translation: it’s the crypto equivalent of a golden retriever in a suit, nodding along to every decision. 🐶💼
Supporting XRP Treasury Firm
Ripple also joined forces with Pantera Capital and SBI Holdings to back Evernorth, an XRP treasury firm that’s basically a trust fund for blockchain dreams. Because nothing says “institutional adoption” like a group of suits whispering, “This time it’s different.” 🤑✨
Evernorth’s mission? To “boost adoption.” Translation: They’ll probably send out press releases and hope the market doesn’t collapse before coffee time. ☕💣
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2025-10-25 00:00