Trump, Bitcoin, and the Art of Not Waging War 🚀💸

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In the quiet corner of the world, where the digital currency Bitcoin maintained its composure, the news from the United States stirred a peculiar calm. President Trump, a man of few words, reportedly refuted the notion of conflict with Iran, a gesture as unexpected as a snowball in a sauna. 🌪️

Iran’s ambassador to Pakistan, a figure of quiet authority, shared this revelation, hinting that Trump had even requested Tehran to refrain from targeting American assets. One might wonder if the President’s diplomatic overtures were born of genuine peace or a desire to avoid another Venezuela-style debacle. 🤷‍♂️

TRUMP SAYS HE WILL NOT ATTACK IRAN

According to Iran’s envoy, Trump’s message was clear: no war, please. He also implored Tehran to avoid a costly game of cat-and-mouse with U.S. interests. A charming man, truly.

– *Walter Bloomberg (@DeItaone) January 15, 2026

Trump’s recent remarks followed a curious claim that Iran had abandoned plans to execute protesters, a statement that left many scratching their heads. Meanwhile, human rights groups reported a grim tally of over 2,400 lives lost in the crackdown-a number that, in the grand scheme of things, might as well be a rounding error. 🧮

The G7, ever the moral compass, issued a statement decrying Iran’s “brutal repression,” a phrase so standard it could be recited in a sleepwalking state. 🤪

Recall that Bitcoin, that fickle friend, once dipped after a U.S. raid in Venezuela. But now, it bounces along at $97K, as unshaken as a monk in a storm. Perhaps the markets, like the world, have learned to ignore the noise and focus on the numbers. 📈

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2026-01-15 16:33